Dear God in Heaven…You know so well that I am not a hater. There are very few things in this world that I hate. You have created this world and all that is in it, and said that “It is good.” How can I hate that which You have made. I know that mankind messed up that which You created as perfect, and with our disobedience, sin, death, disease, and suffering entered Your perfect place. So, I am conflicted this morning, Lord…I am not a hater. There are certainly many things that really annoy me. And, I suppose there are some things that would have to go in the category of “strongly dislike,” but, there are not many things that I hate.
But, Lord, cancer is one of those things that I hate. And, once again my heart is heavy for someone dear to me who has heard that awful word, “cancer.” I HATE cancer. I hate how many people it takes from this world. I hate how it has ruthlessly robbed me of so many precious people from my own life. I hate especially the cruel way it goes about taking people who are Your precious creation…Your children. I hate how it is so uncaring to the people who survive it with great joy having beaten this terrible monster…only to live a life of apprehension every time they go to the doctor wondering “Is it back?” I hate what it puts people through who fight for their life to survive it. The weeks and months of surgeries, doctor visits, chemo treatments, radiaton…the weakness, sickness, and constant battle with discouragement.
I hate what it put my mother in law through. I hate what it put my family members through who suffered from it…and, I hate what it put their spouses and children through as they helplessly stood beside as caregivers and supporters. I hate that three men who are so important in my life…three godly men…three men who love You with all their hearts…and now the most godly woman I know…a woman who thrives on serving You by touching the lives of young women. These are men and women who have more courage and faith than many…who have to battle with this hateful and destructive disease. The only good that comes from their suffering is that I can see and learn what true faith and trust in You can do to calm the anxious soul. I hate that it is indiscriminate in who it afflicts. I cares not that many of the people who it so viciously strikes are some of the most caring, giving, and courageous people I have ever known.
Most of the time I don’t mind weeping all that much, Lord, You know how often my heart breaks and I cannot help but throw myself at Your feet, and ask for Your peace, comfort. But, right now… I hate that I’m weeping,…I hate that because of this disease, I must share the anguish of so many others who are battling hard. I hate to cry just because of cancer….I just hate it.
So Father, let not my hate for this cruel disease quench the Spirit. Allow the Holy Spirit to flow freely through me. Hear my prayers to those who have developed this disease which is so much feared. Be with them in their fear, their loneliness, their uncertainty. Help them as questions crowd their mind: Will I be cured? Will there be pain? How long will I live? How will my family handle this? Lord, be with them in their journey, but I ask with all my heart that they be healed. I pray they will KNOW from Whom their healing comes…and I pray they give the glory to You. And, Lord, for those whose healing is not in Your great plan, I pray You to be with them through the journey. Give peace, let them live with hope, relieve their pain, and let them know Your presence. Give strength to their loved ones who provide such great support for each other. Let them know that Your great hands are supporting them all. We pray in agreement with Your own Words in Jeremiah 30:17 “But I will restore you to health and heal your wounds declares the LORD.” Let it be so, in Jesus Name. Amen
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